What's going on in the northeast? Remember the days when Gary Sheffield, Kenny Lofton, Randy Johnson and some others used to give the Yankees a bad name? Or when A-Rod was presumed to be a bad teammate? Remember when the Yankees were considered "primadonnas" really solely based on their salaries and speculation on what went on in the locker rooms? Well lately there's a team in the northeast, I won't tell you which one, who has been behaving very curiously lately, and they don't don pinstripes.
This "team" has had success in the new millenium, they have won two world championships in the last 89 years, but both have come the last four seasons. They are proclaimed to be the greatest "team" in sports by their own fans, and really besides for their closer having a constipated look on his face when he pitches, the middle of their lineups putting up big post-season numbers and a player or two restructuring their contracts so they can afford new superstars in free agency, I haven't figured out where the title came from. I mean sure they have had success, but that doesn't make you a "professional" that just makes you "talented" and capable of rising to an occasion. But mostly, talented. What I have noticed, is what has been taking place so far this season:
- Their year kicked off with a trip to Japan in the hopes of bringing goodwill internationally, and showcasing their marquee, non-contract caring team in front of a foreign crowd. What transpired was a near holdout from performing in the games where they were receiving extra pay and the debate between whether it was over their ultimate team fighting mentality, or selfishness on the part of the inconvenience towards traveling overseas. No need to restate opinions, the home base felt one way, other fans felt another, we argued with over 30 comments when the event took place and it is over with. Nevertheless, what ever happened, happened and now we need to see how this superior, closely-knit, one in a million team of superheroes has been acting since then. Surely they have bought ponies for each other and solved world hunger.
- This pesky little Tampa team came into the American League East race and hasn't gone away. In fact, as of this writing, the Rays are in first place. When Tampa played another rival in their division the two teams did not get along. Slides were made hard, pitches were thrown near and at people, and James Shields was rejected at one of the AL East sleepovers, presumably. So when Coco Crisp, a backup outfielder for a team I can't remember the name of, was hit in the middle of the leg with a not so fast-fastball, and he charged the mound trying to kill Shields, the lonely pitcher, it was completely understandable. After all, shin accidents have been known to kill baseball players, so Crisp's life was in danger and he wasn't in even more pain after being tackled to the ground by a guy wearing equipment and then getting beaten on by three players from the bad ass Rays. The suspension also made it totally worth it because his team wasn't at all short on healthy outfielders. Teamwork guys, that's why you're the best! Everything on his part made sense, mainly because he was part of the world's greatest assembled mix of personalities and consumate professionalism.
During that same game, the one featuring a a base coach throwing a Tampa player to the ground in a sheer act of maturity, a player named Manny was just being himself when another player called "Youk" cared too much about his own at bats. See, Youkilis (his birth name) hates to fail when he hits, and this Manny guy didn't like that. He preferred that Youkilis think of the entire team as a whole at all times, and stop complaining like a little school girl if his at bats didn't go his way. Too much intensity has been known to make people's legs hurt, and if Coco Crisp doesn't like it, Manny doesn't either. ***So Manny took Kevin Youkilis into the club house away from all the public cameras and politely asked him to stop caring so much about only his at bats, and stay level-headed in regards to everybody's' at-bats as a whole, so the "team" can perform correctly. After all, Youkilis and his over .400 batting average in the post-season (while carrying himself how he has ever since he made the major leagues) meant nothing if he didn't also care about Bobby Kielty. ****
***Actually, Manny tried to kill Youkilis in the dugout shortly after his own team had just brawled the opposition. All of this took place on home field and on TV, thus proving Manny cares about the entire team, and trying to kick his teammates' asses was the best way to represent those sentiments. Sort of like how cutting off your center fielder's throw, or occasionally dogging it or sitting out for long periods of time with phantom injuries is the ultimate representation of "team player".
- Yesterday this Manny "ultimate team player" guy, shoved his team's traveling secretary to the ground. Now I've watched Seinfeld many many times, and I can't recall a single time seeing George Costanza get thrown by Ruben Sierra, but I digress.
So Manny knocks this guy down because he might not have been able to get him 16 tickets for a game. This is a player of the universe's best "team", the same man willing to give up his entire stipend (which probably would have barely paid for his toilet paper) when his team was being forced to play a ridiculous multi-country schedule in the ultimate form of inconvenience, but now his reputation has confused me after this incident. Is it the non-premadonna, team player thing to do to shove your own officials to the ground? Did Shawn Chacon have the right idea? Should Derek Jeter kick Gene Monahan's ass for the hell of it? I'm trying to get a handle on the situation: Manny shoves a team official because the team official might not have been able to get him 16 tickets, which would take 16 seats of fans dying to see their team play away from the game, as a result of not being a primadonna? It's a good thing the man makes league minimum or else I'd be furious he wouldn't just pay for 16 tickets (or however short he was) regardless of the prices.
It's OK though, there was an apology behind closed doors, really this incident isn't worth mentioning.
Meanwhile, to add extra confusion today, the Yankees just called up one of their many promising prospects in the form of Brett Gardner to play center field. Gardner has ridiculous speed and is in the same "spark plug" category as Jacoby Ellsbury, Jose Reyes and a decade ago's Juan Pierre. Though he may not be as good as the actual players, he's the same type of performer. So this group of primadonnas just added another rookie under 6 years of team control, and then Darrell Rasner, a young pitcher still under arbitration, gave an interview praising the overall character in the clubhouse.
My favorites in the interview:
IIATMS: Funniest guy in the locker room?
DR: Damon and Giambi are both hysterical.
Rasner must be lying and this can't be true, I was always under the impression Giambi pumps steroids into the rookies' butts against their will and Damon runs around naked throwing his extra 3 million per season in the air while rubbing his clean-shaven face. These guys aren't supposed to bring joy to their teammates, they both followed the money, and no other player in baseball is low enough to degrade themselves with extra pay by a team who thought they were worth it, so they must both be evil.
IIATMS: Best part of the lockerroom?
DR: The clubhouse is made up of a bunch of great guys who know exactly what it takes to win. There is never a moment of panic from anyone, which is part of being a Yankee.
Lies! If they knew what it took to win, they'd be winning, stupid. And the fact they don't panic and don't throw temper tantrums over singular at bats like Youkilis, or after errors like Reyes just means they are robotic and have no personalities. They are so business-like, it makes them primadonnas.
IIATMS: What’s the one thing you wish the fans could witness about being in the lockerroom, once the reporters are gone and the cameras are off?
DR: The guys are all down to earth, and everyone treats each other incredibly well. There are really no ego issues, which is amazing, given the collection of superstars on the team.
Darrell Rasner is either telling the truth because he has absolutely no reason to do anything else, or he's a bigger liar than Jim Carrey before his son ruined his career as a lawyer in "Liar Liar". Down to earth? No, they have too much contract for that, and as we know from other teams, too much pay means too much unhappiness. No ego issues? I doubt that, Alex Rodriguez walks around with rookies attached to his feet so he doesn't have to touch the ground, and he sleeps with their wives. Jose Canseco says so. Everyone has to have an ego, that's what the media said years ago, therefore we can't change our opinions despite everything to the contrary, that's un-fanlike. Treating each other well is overrated. In fact, according to the book of the greatest "team" of all time, you're supposed to charge the mound on the field and fight each other physically off the field whether you're a professional athlete or not... So maybe Rasner is telling the truth here.
IIATMS: Which teammate has surprised you the most (ie: being friendlier, funnier, more serious, etc.)?
DR: A-Rod. He is incredibly kind and friendly, and takes an active interest in his teammates. He’s been awesome to me.
Fibbing, fibbing, and more fibbing. I won't believe that for a second. After all, Rasner is only in the locker room every game, therefore he must just be too used to A-Rod's primadonna ways. What a waste of an interview, where was the incredible insight disproving everything people assume for no reason just because a guy makes a lot of pay?
Long live the greatest group of consumate professionals. One day my Primadonnas will catch up to you, but for now they'll just continue acting like "the Evil Empire."
Recent Comments